How to debate to change the world

There are all sorts of tips and strategies about how to debate. I am not a debate coach, but from what I understand, at the cor, debates are something that is understood as something as you either win or loose. As we conclude the last Republican party debate for 2015, there is chatter about who won and who lost. The underlying assumption is that debates are to be done in a manner that if you "win" you change the minds of others and if you loose you failed to do that. 

Some in the Church feel like religion is a big debate. That is a series of conversations that happen in order to "convert" someone to their team through arguments. I have yet to meet anyone who has ever been persuaded to much of anything  though debates and arguments. And this is an unfortunate byproduct of the original goal of debates - that is to change the world.  

I would like to share with you a secret I learned from very wise clergy mentors on how to debate in order to change the world. It is easy to understand and yet perhaps the most difficult thing to do. I have learned through this practice however that this simple yet difficult act can and has changed people's minds and even the world. 

Here is what you do.

When you are in a debate with someone, stop for just one moment and try to hear what it is the other person values in their argument. Then, affirm that value. 

That is it. If you are able to affirm the value of the other person something happens. 

First, you have to listen, and I mean really listen in order to identify the underlying value. Second, you have to give your conversation partner credit for something that is, in your mind, good and valid. Giving credit to one you are in a debate with is often seen as weakness in a debate as though you are conceding the argument. Third, when you affirm the other person's value you are affirming them as a person of worth and value. You no longer see them as opposition but as equal peer. 

For instance if you are opposed to individuals owning a certain type of gun and you are en ganged in a conversation with someone who owns the exact type of gun you oppose and you wanted to create a change: try first to listen to the underlying value to their reasons for owning such a gun(s). Perhaps it is freedom or safety or a right. Whatever the value is, can you then make a statement that affirms that value. It might sound like, "I think your appreciation for personal freedom is really excellent and I wonder if you would be willing to share more about other ways you desire to safeguard freedom." 

And therein lies the way to debate to change the world. If we are able to listen to another, share in words of grace and affirm the "other" as a person and not an enemy, then the debate model is turned on its head. It no longer is about trying to get another person to come to your side as it is about you growing in empathy and compassion to try to see the world through their eyes.

And with more empathy in the world, the world will change. 

Even Jesus Could Not Convince Us

There is a story in the Bible of two disciples of Jesus walking to  town called Emmaus. These two disciples are talking about all that had happened in the following week in which their teacher was condemned and killed and apparently raised from the dead. While they were talking a third man came upon them and heard what they were talking about. This third man asked of whom they were talking about and the original disciples are floored that this stranger had not heard about what happened to Jesus over the past week. The disciples shared how they had hoped Jesus would have been a particular type of leader only to have their hopes dashed by Rome. 

This stranger then went on to talk about how the two disciples really do not understand the scriptures and how it was important for the messiah to be killed and raised from the dead. In fact the stranger goes through the entire story of the Hebrew scriptures trying to show them that in fact they have misguided expectations about the messiah. 

The two disciples are not convinced. They invite this stranger to share in a meal only to discover at the breaking of the bread that the stranger is no other than Jesus Christ himself!

There is much to talk about in this story but perhaps it is worth noting that even Jesus Christ could not convince two of his own disciples through arguments and sharing of ideas. 

If Jesus cannot convince his own disciples to change their hearts through arguments, how can any Christian expect to change the hearts of others through arguments? 

It is only in the breaking of the bread that the disciples' hearts are changed. It was only through relationship and meals and fellowship and being vulnerable that they could see Christ. 

Rational arguments are really only good to help you confirm what you already believe. Few people's minds (much less hearts) are changed from rational arguments. But the world was (and still is) changed through relationships. 

May we stop arguing and begin breaking bread. 

What face are we looking at?

In the beginning of the Exodus story we read of Moses on the Mountain and is afraid. Moses hides his face from viewing God (Ex 3:6). 

As the story goes on and Moses confronts Pharaoh, Pharaoh gets so angry with Moses that in Exodus 10:28-29 you have this exchange:

Then Pharaoh said to him, ‘Get away from me! Take care that you do not see my face again, for on the day you see my face you shall die.’Moses said, ‘Just as you say! I will never see your face again.’

And from that day onward Moses no longer looks at the face of Pharaoh. But more interesting is that as the Exodus continues Moses comes closer to seeing God's face until at the end of the entire story of Moses you get this:

Never since has there arisen a prophet in Israel like Moses, whom the Lord knew face to face. - Deut. 34:10

Converting to anything is really just a series of 'turnings' through one's life. Over the course of Moses' life there are a series of turnings from the face of Pharaoh to the face of God. 

The invitation to Christianity is an invitation to turn toward a different face. 

Conversion is not a one time thing. It is a process. Few are able to make the total turn. Christians are invited to turn toward God through the ways of Jesus. This is why Christians identify Jesus as the "way". We can turn all sorts of ways in our lives, but we come to understand God when we turn toward the way of Jesus.  

I have no doubt that God can be known in many other ways - I mean Moses did not proclaim Jesus as his Lord and Savior and yet the scripture says that Moses was the only person to be known by God face to face. 

This is a reason I follow the ways of Jesus. I trust (have faith) that his way is a way that will lead me to be like Moses, and be known by God face to face - here and now.