Being conquered by the disciplines

The other day I heard Rev. Nancy Allen mention that the disciplines that one may take on for Lent are not to be seen as something to conquer. For instance, if you are fasting from chocolate and "power through" the season without eating chocolate, it may seem like an acceptable way to talk about your success in "conquering" the temptation to eat chocolate. 

However, from a spiritual formation stand point the spiritual disciplines are not for us to "conquer". The spiritual disciplines are designed to "conquer" us. 

The disciplines are called disciplines because they "discipline" our mind, spirit, body and heart. They work on us over time to wear us down in order to remake us. They conquer us, in a sense, in order that we may be transformed. 

Even the non-religious disciplines break us down in order to transform us. 

Franklin-Covey and the calendaring systems they have are disciplines designed to force us to behave in a way so that our habits are different - that we are transformed into a more organized person (or so the promise goes). 

“We enter the land of silence by the silence of surrender, and there is no map of the silence that is surrender…. The practice of silence…cannot be reduced to a spiritual technique. Techniques are all the rage today. They suggest a certain control that aims to determine a certain outcome. They clearly have their place. But this is not what contemplative practice does…. A spiritual practice simply disposes us to allow something to take place. For example, a gardener does not actually grow plants. A gardener practices certain gardening skills that facilitate growth that is beyond the gardener’s direct control.”

— Martin Laird - Into the Silent Land

So may we be conquered by the disciplines of the season. 

Footprints in the sand, sort of...

There is beloved poem call Footprints. I have never been a fan of that poem. Maybe because I see it everywhere or because it harkens me to a sentimentality that might be helpful for others but is lacking for me. The more that I think about it thought I think my inability to connect with this poem is because of the location of the one walking on the beach in relation to Jesus. Not the part where the walker is being carried by Jesus, but the part where the walker is walking next to Jesus.

I feel called to follow Jesus. He is my leader and model. He is the forerunner of the faith. He is the one who steps first and I am behind him. He leads and I follow.

The poem gives me the impression that the walker is choosing to or has the courage to walk beside Jesus. I have a hard time following someone when I am walking alongside them. Sometimes I turn one way and they turn the other. I never really die to my agenda when I walk along side Jesus, which is why I believe he calls us to follow.

Today, I attempted to do what many have done but I never had. I attempted to literally walk in the footsteps of another person.

There were a set of footprints left in the sand and I began to follow them. Their gait became my gait. Their pacing became my pacing. Their turns and direction became my turn and direction. I had no idea where the steps would take me. All I did was follow.

In the beginning it was somewhat easy to walk step for step. There were no other prints along that stretch of beach and the shoe pattern was distinct and clear. Even though they were easy to see it was a little tricky to walk exactly in their steps. I got off balance sometimes and there were a couple of times I thought they were beginning to turn ever so much in one direction but they did not and I was off on the next footprint by a few inches. With my eyes fixed to the path and very alert to any changes in every step I found my leader began to step into beach that was more traveled.

This was a little more difficult to follow, but not too bad. At this point I had the pacing and spacing of my leaders footprints down. But instead of looking just for the very next step, I had to look up a bit in order to see where the leader was walking. If I focused on just the next step I could not recognize their footprint quickly enough and then I would break stride and become off balance. Additionally, due to the traffic of different prints, there were times I could not see the very next step but only the next step or two after that. In order to make it to the step I could see, I had to walk in faith and trust that I was stepping on the footprints of my leader. I had to walk by faith and not by sight.

The most difficult part of my mimic walking was when the prints turned and now the sun was to my back. This caused my own shadow to be cast right in front of me and washing out the footprints. I could no longer see the little shadows cast in the ridges of the footprint of my leader. The only way I could walk in the footprints of my leader was very slowly and only after I had moved to one side in order to allow the sunshine to reveal the footprints. My own dark side became an obstacle to following in the footprints of my leader.

In the call of Christ we are called to follow. A disciples does not walk in their own path and in their own way, but conforms their walk to that of the master, Jesus. It is cool to forge your own way, and in many ways it is easier than to try to exactly mimic another, but it seems clear the call of Jesus is to follow. Not to lead.

Hats

I do not like to wear hats because they never fit right.

Which is why I prefer hats that form around my head.

Fitted baseball hats, toboggans, even bandannas are welcomed because,

These hats conform, they are comfortable.

These are the hats my friends wear and we all agree hats should be made to conform to us.

And this crown of thorns I was given, I rarely put it on.

It does not conform to me.

I must conform to it.

Christians cannot choose what we care about

Christians cannot choose what we care about

There was a guy who said that you have to read your Bible and the newspaper side by side as a way of saying that acts of piety and acts of justice are interconnected.

I am ashamed to say that when I am in exclusively Christian circles, more than any other group, I hear the sentence, “Oh, I don’t watch the news. It is all horrible and awful.” Following that sentence, any number of people chime in and talk about just how much they dislike the news for whatever reason. I have yet to be in that conversation where someone stands up for watching the news as a critical element of being a Christian.

We no longer read the paper and Bible together.

I not only do not understand how we can decide that we do not want to watch the news because it is too depressing, but I also do not understand where we got the idea that we could choose not to care?

Christians cannot choose what we can and cannot care about. We are to die to ourselves and to conform our lives our wills our desires to that of Christ’s. We do not have the freedom to choose what we care about. We do not have the freedom to choose who to love. This is, in part, what it means to serve Christ.

Christians care about what Christ cares about. Christians care about who Christ cares about.

And who has Christ chosen to care about? The marginalized. The victims of violence. The beaten, the broken, the hurting, the sick, the dying the horrific events in the world.

And where do we learn about where the people Christ cares about?

The news.

Sure I would rather be entertained and binge watch my favorite show. I would rather check status updates, view follow twitter feeds, view filtered Instagram pictures and laugh at #FailVine.

But we do not get to choose when we want to care about who and what we want to care about.

Christ, our Lord and Teacher, already chose for me.